sorry it’s been so long, i’ve just been in quite a funk. i’ve lost 5 lbs this week… it doesn’t feel like it though. i disgust myself.
i finally got an appointment with my doctor. i’ll be seeing her on the 31st. i need to talk to her about maybe some new diagnosis’s being: AvPD (avoindant personality disorder) and BPD (borderline personality disorder) along with my already diagnosed MDD (major depressive disorder) and extreme vitamin D deficiency. i can’t wait to get back on medication. maybe i can get some stuff for my sleeping problems, too.
i want to be happy.
i want to be normal.
- me every night: ok tomorrow i'll never eat again
today i stole razors from my local store. i felt like scum. i got home and was good about not eating, but it wasn’t long until my self control wore thin and i gave in. i hate myself, now my legs are bleeding through my jeans. i hate it when that happens…
